Week 9 Story, A Walk By the River
Ganga
(Source)
It was a normal day, like any other. The advisors were badgering me yet again about when I would wed and produce an heir.
"When I find the right woman," I told them for perhaps the thousandth time.
I was restless and antsy. The huge palace felt claustrophobic. I had wandered through every room a hundred times. I just needed a change of scenery. I decided to go for a walk by the river. That was perhaps the best decision of my life, because it let me meet her.
I felt less trapped walking the pathway that followed the riverbank. The gentle breeze and sound of birds calmed me. The cool water called to me. I left my sandals on the bank, and waded into the water. I closed my eyes and lost myself in the sensation of the current swirling around my ankles. I turned my face to the sun and took a deep breath, relishing the feeling of the warm rays on my face.
When I re-opened my eyes, there was a face mere inches from mine. I jumped with a start. The smooth river rocks beneath my feet shifted, and I lost my balance, falling backward into the water, and landing unceremoniously on my royal rear. The woman before me put a hand demurely to her mouth to stifle her giggles as she glided back into the river, sinking until only her eyes remained above the water. They glinted with mischief.
I scrambled to my feet again, embarrassed. But as I struggled to form a coherent sentence, her visage stole the words from my lips, leaving me speechless. Her hair swirled around her in the current. Her eyes were a brilliant blue, the color of water on a clear sunny day. She slowly, cautiously approached me. Her giggle reminded me of a babbling brook. As she emerged from the water, her sari clung to her body in the most enticing way. She was stunning.
"I didn't mean to startle you," she said. "You just seemed so at peace, so in tune with the water, and I was drawn to you."
"I...What...Who are you?" I stammered.
"My name is Ganga," she said, giving a coy smile that made my heart flutter.
"As in.... the River Ganges...? The river we're standing in?" I asked.
"The very same. So tell me, what is a king doing splashing in the river?"
"I just needed some space. I felt confined in the palace."
She seemed to consider me for a moment, sizing me up. " Can I show you something?" she asked.
"Anything." I would follow this woman anywhere.
She gently took my hand. Suddenly the world disappeared. I felt boundless and free. I felt powerful and fluid. I felt my roots in the mountains, where drops of rain and melted snow slowly collected and joined until I was at my full strength. I felt myself rush over waterfalls and crash into the lakes below. I drifted around lazy bends. I tickled the feet of women washing clothes in my water. I offered myself to the thirsty animals on my banks.
Suddenly I was back in my own body. I sat up, gasping for breath as my face broke the surface of the water. I looked at the resplendent Ganga. She regarded me with curiosity.
I blurted out "Will you marry me?"
Author's Note: I wanted a more personal, emotional telling of King Shantanu falling in love with Ganga.
Bibliography: The Mahabharata, By Epified
Howdy Alex,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your story. I liked how the guy actually waited for the right woman to come along because it is a common trend in the epics for the men to jump at the first opportunity, they have to create an heir I feel like. I also really enjoyed the imagery you used during the riverbank scene. Overall, I though your story was very amusing and commendable.
Hi Alex!
ReplyDeleteI loved how you changed the perspective of the story of Ganga and Shantanu to first-person of Shantanu. It really puts you inside his head and makes you understand what he was feeling in the moment that he met Ganga. Also, your imagery is truly incredible. You describe the water and how it felt to Shantanu as well as the moment he saw Ganga for the first time so vividly I could picture it perfectly in my head. Good job!
Hey Alex, I really enjoyed this story because your descriptive detail was amazing. I enjoy your use of creating a story more centered about Shantanu because it puts it into his perspective and helps the reader put themselves in a closer position with the characters. I think the quotations you used are a great addition as well too because I like hearing straight from the characters! Great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Alex,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your story!! I love you choice of diction! It really brought the story to life and painted a vivid image of what you wanted to convey to the reader! I love the dialogue too! It really let me know what the characters were thinking. Overall, you did a really great job on your story! I also really liked the image you used! For an extra credit I watch the youtube movie of that very image you chose!